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Thursday, September 08, 2005

Its so Easy..... (Reflections of a SAHM - Part 4)

Its so easy.....

  1. to shake/throw a crying baby who won't stop crying
  2. to leave a baby sitting in his poo/pee when you've changed one diaper too many
  3. to slap a toddler who won't eat food you've so painfully prepared
  4. to hit a noisy child who won't stop whining (its ok to hit to discipline but I'm talking about hitting very hard.. much more than is justified)
  5. to beat up a kid who messes up after everything you've just cleaned/picked up
  6. to starve a helpless baby who refuses to drink up his/her milk
  7. to lock up a kid unattended in a room so that you'd have some private time/they'd quit following you around when you're too busy
  8. to forget simple child safety measures when you are too distracted (eg. letting a child get too near the fire, playing with telephone or other cords, not being nearby to monitor when a child is climbing all over unsafe furniture, allowing a child to eat foods that could be choking hazards unsupervised etc.. its a long, looo...nng list)
  9. to let a naughty kid have his/her way (ie to give in to unreasonable demands) so that you could get on with whatever it is you need to do (the opposite of hitting too hard)
  10. to ignore/neglect a baby who needs attention when you're preoccupied

Its just too easy to abuse/neglect a helpless baby/child especially a child who is not old enough to tell. And it becomes easier and easier the more and more hours you have to deal with the baby/child. I know. Cos' I have to deal with 2 under 4 years of age 24/7 and I have to constantly remind myself not to do any of those things above. And I'm the mother! What more a maid/sitter who is unrelated to the child. Especially if its a young maid from a foreign country struggling to make a living away from her own family and friends in an unfamiliar place. Gosh. Scary!

Why I'm a SAHM.....

I don't have any mum or mum-in-law who could help out (Even if I had I would not ask them to help out. Looking after young kids is very hard work and I think its unfair to ask our elderly parents to help us out when they should be enjoying their golden years. Hey! They've already gone through the tough part with us! Let them enjoy a little bit now.)

I could never leave my child alone with a maid at home and I have no one to act as a watchful eye (Its important to have another adult around to spy monitor the situation at home) so that too is out of the question.

I hate the idea of leaving my little ones at a sitter when they are so young (I'd like them to be in the comfort of their own home, not needing to be woken up very early and rushed from place to place. Life is a rush, so why start rushing them so young) so thats out too. My kids wake up when they've had enough rest. And they wake up to a relaxed mummy who's there to play with them a little before breakfast. I don't have to wake them up from their sleep, then change a sleepy baby and rush them out of the house. I just hate the thought of having to do that.)

Being of such untrusting nature. Hehe. (Especially when it comes to my kids), thats why I'm a SAHM. In my 10 points above, I was merely talking about the basic act of childcare ie feeding and cleaning but theres so much more to it. Theres the act of nurturing, disciplining, teaching, guiding, giving love and attention to build security and so much more. How could I possibly leave all that to another person to handle for hours on end? So thats why I'm a SAHM and loving it!

Disclaimer: These are my personal opinions. Please understand that I'm not saying theres anything wrong with mums who do not care for their children themselves full time. So don't flame me. :)

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