Father and Child Bonding

I was worried for a long time because my son did not seem to bond very much with his father. At least, not the way his sister does. He always seems to want me only. He usually rejects his daddy.

I believe the reason is because, my husband spent a lot of time with my girl when she was a baby. He would hold her to sleep, help me bathe the girl, etc. And later on, when I was pregnant with my son and often tired, he would take the girl out with him to the park, supermarket etc so that I could get some rest. So he has a close bond with the girl.

When my boy was born, again, the same thing happen. He would often take the girl out so that I would have some relief to spend time trying to breastfeed the boy without interruptions because I had a lot of difficulties breastfeeding. He would still help me bathe the boy etc but his time had to be divided because he had to help me look after the girl.

As a result, my boy is not that close to him. They didn't get a chance to bond. I always try to find things for them to do together but it did not work. The boy always preferred me.

However, recently, I noticed that they have started to bond more. This is because my husband would spend every evening coaching the boy in his Maths. Oh, he is a fierce teacher and he would often scold the boy, sometimes till he cries but funnily, my boy now no longer rejects him and would look for him more and more now.

I believe that bonding is a process of doing things together. It need not only be fun activities. It should be daily activities. Bathing, feeding, talking, teaching. I believe that these daily simple activities are very important for parent and child bonding and if left to a domestic helper than you would have lost the most precious moments of bonding with your kids.

My husband had less opportunity to bond with his son the way he bonded with his daughter when she was a baby but I am happy that they are catching up now. Its not too late that they are catching up now when he is 5 years old. :) My husband shares a very special bond with my girl and soon, I hope he will have his own special bond with his son too. I am very glad to see this happening now. Before this, I was a bit worried.

Speaking of bonding, I feel that my husband and I share another bond now compared to those days when we were just a couple. This bond is the bond that comes from our mutual love for our children. :)

School First Term Review

First term has come and gone. Here's my own thoughts or review of my girl's first term in Standard One in a Chinese School.

On the school:

• We are happy with the school. The teachers are hardworking and the facilities are good. We felt that the class teacher was unapproachable at first but she has turned out ok so far. She even takes phone calls from us after school if we are not sure about something and want to check with her. The Malay teacher is ok too but the English teacher is rather lazy, often not turning up, doesn't teach much when he does, just allows the kids to watch video lessons and often does not mark the work. Fortunately English is not a problem for my girl because the level of English taught is too easy. The Chinese and Malay languages level is much higher.
• There is not much homework and the teachers are not as fierce as we had envisioned. There is no caning or ridiculous punishment (no standing on chairs etc) for things like forgetting to bring text books, not completing homework etc. At the most, the teacher's will threaten. They tend to use rewards more. Children get special stars and badges to encourage them. School hours are ok. The girl does not need to stay back in school. Staying back is not compulsory until Std 3.
• There are no frequent calls for donations (as I was told often happens in a chinese school), only 2 so far ie once during school orientation and again now during midterm because the school is going to do some upgrading works. We feel these are justified and so we donate happily, not reluctantly.

My girl:

• I would say that she has finally adjusted to Chinese school though she is still not entirely comfortable in it.
• She insists that she still only has 2 friends in the school. However, she is very chatty with the boy who sits beside her whom is not included in her circle of 2 friends. I do see her waving and talking to others and some of her classmates call out to her when they see her but she still claims that she has only 2 friends. One of this 2 happens to be a girl whose parents we met up with during Chinese New Year so that the girls can get to know each other which means that she has only made 1 friend on her own. I guess that only very special people will be given the status of "friend" by her.
• She does not talk much during recess. She says that she justs goes to eat, then goes back to the class by herself.
• She is still not very comfortable speaking in Mandarin although her knowledge of it and written Chinese is good
• Her class teacher keeps on stressing that she has very little confidence. The teacher says that she must change this attitude. She is afraid of asking the teacher questions and often does not stand up straight when talking to the teacher, which is another sign of her lack of confidence. Her teacher also says she tends to do things in a slow motion. I think that language is the main problem here. Quite often when she is unsure about something, she will agonise about how to ask the teacher about it. She will plan what to say and how to say it in Mandarin to the teacher before she goes to bed and when she gets home from school the next day, quite often I find that she did not eventually ask the teacher and then she would worry about it again in the night.
• Apart from her timid behaviour in class, she has done well in her studies. She is hardworking, completes all her homework, understands what is being taught in class, often gets good grades for her daily work and did well during the first term exam.

So now we are firmly in Chinese school and no turning back or switching now, only looking forward. Looking forward to more ways we can help her. Help her overcome her fears in school. Help her work on her self esteem and become more confident. Help her overcome the barrier she feels in school. Any good suggestions on how to do this would be most welcome.

How to make an award ribbon rosette

This is the front portion of the completed award ribbon rosettes

This is the back portion of the completed award ribbon rosettes

The girl kept on pestering me to make these award ribbon rosettes with her during the school holidays. I didn't take step by step photos so I will try my best to explain how to do them.

What you need to make the award ribbon rosette:

1. Cardboard Paper
2. Fabric or Crepe paper
3. Coloured ribbon
4. Tape (to tape the rosette)
5. Double sided tape (to attach the front and back portion together)
6. Safety Pin
7. Scissors

How to make the award ribbon rosette:

1. Cut out two large circles using the cardboard paper measuring about 8cm in width for the front and back portion of the award
2. Cut out 10 smaller circles using the fabric for the frills on the side or for the rosette
3. Fold the fabric circles in half and then into half again and then arrange them in a circle at the back of one of the cardboard circle
4. Tape the fabric circles one at a time at the back of one of the cardboard paper circle (This makes the front portion)
5. Tape the colored ribbon onto the back of another cardboard paper circle (This makes the back portion)
6. Use double sided tape to attach the front and back portions together back to back ie ribbons facing fabric
7. Finally, tape a safety pin onto the back of the completed award ribbon rosette

I hope that wasn't too difficult to understand. Step by step photos is better but I didn't manage to take any photos this time around.
I didn't use fabric because I find them harder to fold so I substituted with crepe paper and other recycled paper which I kept from hampers etc for doing crafts.
So next time you receive hampers or gift wrappers, do keep them for recycling. They are great for making crafts.
After we completed the ribbon rosettes, the kids wore each of theirs proudly around the house all day long.

How to make a toilet paper roll robot

"Its a kite.... No..... Its a car with one wheel...... No.... its a dolphin carrying bags..... No..... its a donkey....... No.... Its a garlic toast bread which my 5 year old is having for breakfast."

Having breakfast with the kids is an adventure trip to imagination land.

During the holidays, we got the kids to use their imaginations to make robots out of toilet paper rolls. It is an extremely easy craft to do for young kids.

Here's what you need:

1. Empty Toilet Paper Roll
2. Aluminium Foil
3. Tapes
4. Stickers
5. Straws or Pipe Cleaners

Here's how to make the toilet paper roll robots.
Wrap the aluminium around the empty toilet paper roll. Tape the straws or pipe cleaners to make the robot's antennas. Then decorate with stickers and voila! You have yourself a cute little homemade craft robot that the kids can use their imagination to play with.
Here's the end result of our toilet paper roll robot. As you can see, its very easy to make and self explanatory just by looking at the pictures. We cheated because we had adorable looking stickers to use but you can also use colored papers cut out into shapes and paste them on for eyes, nose and buttons for the robot and the results will be just as nice. :)

All About Swine Flu

On June 11, 2009, the World Health Organization (WHO) raised the worldwide pandemic alert level to Phase 6 for the global spread of the H1N1 Flu virus. In other words a global H1N1 Flu Virus pandemic has been declared.

I found some useful resources, links and articles about Swine Flu. I have posted them on my other blogs. You can read them here:

How to talk to your child about swine flu
H1N1 Flu (Swine Flu) and You