Parent Martyr

Who's a Parent Martyr?

1. the working mum who tries too hard to be a good wife, mother, daughter, sister, employee/boss, colleague and has too little time or forgets about herself in the process
2. the working dad who feels constant pressure and stress to provide for the family financially and worries all the time about what will happen to the family if he is not in the driving seat and in the process grows a few more white hairs or turn bald!
3. the working dad who tries to do the above plus try to help out the Ah SAHM in their job and in the process becomes very resentful
4. the Ah SAHM or Ah SAHD who works 24/7 at a job which is physically taxing and emotionally draining and in the process turns either into a door mat or worse .... a nag! or both (ie a nagging door mat. Yikes! What an awful combination.)

What happens to Parent Martyrs?

I am in danger of turning into Parent Martyr type 4. So How? Better do something for myself very soon. Like, have a nice uninterupted shower for instance. Or go out and buy myself some luxury item which I don't need. Ooh I haven't bought anything for myself just for the pleasure of it for I can't remember how long.

When you are a SAHM and your family is supported by just one income you have to forgo a lot of little luxuries. My wish list is now a mile long. I wish to have flowers, perfume, make-up, SKII.... (this Ah SAHM woman mah, very vain one....) , pretty clothes (this one cannot fulfill when you're fat! they make pretty clothes for thin ppl only so can only ogle. Cis!) and shoes (this Ah SAHM has only one black bag and one black shoe, sooooo boring. I'm dying for some coloured stuff but it seems so wasteful when I hardly get to use them?), some nice music CDs cause I love music (but that too is wasteful when you don't have the time to listen and there's free internet radio). Theres lots more on my wish list but I won't bore anyone reading lah.

I had my hair done during Chinese New Year. Since its a once a year thing, Mr MG told me no worries go and have a nice hairdo but it cost a bomb (*pengsan*) I feel so guilty plus I could have bought so many other things on my wish list and worse still now the hair is back to the Ah SAHM look! Ish! Nevermind, I have my blog. Now thats for me, I and myself. My thinking place and ranting place where I can laugh at myself and cry if I want to. And today, I feel like crying and laughing at the same time.

Forgiveness

Once upon a time, someone I care about betrayed my trust. Ouch! It hurt me very much then. I couldn't sleep for weeks! I was 7 1/2 pregnants then so not being able to sleep made me worry about the baby and that made me even more sleepness! What a nightmare!

Well, its people you love who has the greatest power to hurt you the most. I mean, afterall, if you didn't care two hoots about that person, you wouldn't feel hurt in the first place now, would you? I decided to forgive that person. What is forgiveness?

Forgiveness is... letting go, really letting go and NEVER allowing it to hurt you or your relationship with that person EVER again (this means no bringing it up, especially not in times of anger, now thats true letting go).

So how do you let go? Before that, you must first come to terms with the hurt and the one who caused the hurt. Ask all the questions you have, cry, shout, rant and do whatever it takes to get it out of your system in other words COME TO TERMS with it. You are entitled to that.

Forgiveness is... not forgetting. They are two very different things. Even until now, I still think about that betrayal. It still mades me sad BUT I will NEVER bring it up again nor will I dwell on it and allow me to cause me more pain. Its in the past, gone now, burried, dead, kaput! Allowing a past wrong to continue to hurt the present and the future is indeed a very stupid thing to do. Thats letting go... Maybe in time, I will forget but probably by that time I would also have forgotten a lot of other things!

I am happy I found out about the wrong and actually thankful to the person who told me about the wrong. Yes! Because knowing about it actually turned it into an opportunity, an opportunity for me to get this obstacle out of the way and move on to concentrate on other more important things. I am grateful the 'cat is out of the bag' so the person would no longer have to keep this secret from me, thats so unhealthy for this person's wellbeing. So between the bliss of not knowing and the pain of knowing coupled with the better wellbeing of this person, I choose the latter.

Don't understand what I'm talking about? Nevermind, this post is for me. I only have this to say, If you have hurt someone, confess it, then do whatever that is necessary to help the person you hurt get over it, then move on. Its bad for the soul to keep quiet about it. If someone has hurt you and is remorseful, forgive that person, then move on.

No!

Baby Image from Hassle Free Clip Art.com

MG to toddler:

"No! You can't have that. Please put it back!"

"No! Don't touch that! Thats dangerous."

"No! Don't pull baby's hair."

"No! Don't put that in your mouth."

"No! Don't climb on the table."

"No! You can't have another tub of yoghurt. One a day is enough."

and the list goes on.....

Toddler to MG:

MG: "Come here and change your diapers."
Toddler: "No."

MG: "Come here and eat your porridge."
Toddler: "No."

MG: "Come here. Its time for your bath."
Toddler: "No."

MG: "Come and wear your socks."
Toddler: "No."

The moral of the story: What goes around comes around.

Recently toddler has discovered the power of the word "No" so she's busy practising it. *(*rolls eyes*) "The experts" say don't say "No" to a child too often or this is what you get. "The experts" also say let them win some battles, blah..blah..blah.

This is a toughie for parents. Some rules needs to be established so that we don't end up with little spoilt brats running around but sometimes this is easier said than done. Its easy, waaaaaay too easy, to give in when one is very busy, running late or just too darned tired. (MG: "No, don't touch the keyboard!" Time to go... Be back later!)

Poll Results

MG's "I Love You" Poll is now officially closed.

Here are the results. And (*drum roll*) the Grand Total of people voting is....(*more drum roll*) errr (*giggling* "Don't laugh ya?) 18! (*Ta da!*)

MG's Poll
Will You Say It?
Yes, Very Important, must say everyday one 33.3% (Nos:6 voted)
Yes, On Special Occassions and when I'm in the mood lah 61.1% (Nos:11 voted)
No Need Lah, So Shy, show enough mah 0% (No: 0 voted. Mr MG would have voted for this I think so MG married a very unique, special, one of a kind man, coz no one else chose this. Hehe)
What for? He/She should know how I feel 5.6% (No: 1 voted. Who's this? Please own up. Haha. Sorry, just kidding. Your identity is protected.)
Thanks for Voting!

For those of you interested in running your own poll in your own blog. Here is the url I used to create the poll. The International Voting Centre Its really easy to create. Just type in your heading and questions, choose the layout and colours and generate. You will get a script to paste in your page or a url which I used. Easy? Why not give it a try. You can run a poll on just about anything your little heart so desires. Its your blog after all, so who cares right?

"I love you."

Guy: "I love you"
Girl: "I love you too"
(Couple look at each other's eyes, locked in warm embrace and mmmmmmuah smack!)

Just how important is this phrase "I love you." And Just how often is it uttered? Especially in a less expressive culture like ours?

We get a lot of the above scene, thanks to reading all those teenage romance novels and romantic movies but how is it like in real life? Are guys more 'shy' to utter it? Are girls more eager to hear it? Is it a gender difference thing or a culture thing, whether its uttered or not?

These are questions MG is asking herself today. You see, I don't think many of us grew up in homes where everybody runs around saying "I love you." Mr MG has said it ? times (*count count count*) err.. use one hand oso can count. Claims he's "shy" wor. He says action speaks louder than words. He says always say oso meaningless if the action says otherwise. So how to tell if my Mr MG loves me? Hmmm... ok lets see,

• he switches on/off my handphone for me when we are going out and makes sure my batteries are charged. (Haha. this one oso counted. Little things counts mah.)
• he goes out and buys me a headband when he sees mine is broken
• he tries to make me laugh when I'm upset
• once he tagged along with his lady colleagues to a costume jewellery warehouse sale and bought some for me (oh the jewellery is not important to me but the act of tagging along with the female colleagues to do a girl thing like dungu like that. haha.)
• he refrains from shouting back at me when I'm shouting at him (really ha, this Mr MG got very good self control wan. Can speak calmly to people even when people shouting at him)
• he always makes sure I don't forget important stuff cos I'm a "tai tou har" (tai tou har = big head prawn/forgetful)
• ada banyak lagi (theres a lot more) but I won't bore anyone reading with little details, I keep in my heart lah

One of the rare times he said it was during our wedding. As according to the Chinese custom, he could not collect the bride and had to go through all the bride's "chi mui" (chi mui = sisters and girlfriends) first. Second sister asked "Why do you want to marry my sister?" and Mr MG said "Because I love her very much!" Aiyoh, MG inside the room "kam tong toh seh" (very touched). Buden hor, some eager young nephew or niece chose that exact moment to bang into the video camera wor. Sob sob sob. So MG kenot play it over and over again, no more evidence, all wiped out liao accept in the head and heart.

I know Mr MG loves me lah but then still I'd like to hear it more often. I know the man more than 10 years but has heard it less than 5 times! (Hmm... that averages less than once in 2 years. Aiyoh!) I oso seldom say wan becos shy mah. Write maybe easier lah but to say it feel a bit one kind. Maybe its our culture.... or maybe its just us.

Is saying or hearing "I Love You" all that important? I'm not sure........ What do you think? Click on the link to take MG's mya KPC Poll.

Late Bloomer

I'm a late bloomer. Pak tor in late 20s. Married in mid 30s. Start a family in late 30s.

(*calculate calculate*) Seh loh (Seh loh = "Die lah" in cantonese or "Oh Dear"). By the time I'm in my 50s my children still in primary school! Aiyoh! Like dat daddy, mummy have to work very hard until turn old and grey. Kenot retire early.

Some of my friend's kids already in their teens and here I am with my baby and toddler. Ah.. (*bulb lights up*) No wonderlah, I have so few friends now. All of them talking about how well their kids doing in school etc, no one wants to listen to my baby talk.

I remember when we were taking our wedding photos, there were 2-3 other couples, all SYTs and HYTs. (SYT/HYT = Sweet/Handsome Young Things). When the makeup artists was dolling me up right beside this SYT doll, I pointed to the doll and asked "Why can't I have sweet makeup like hers pink-pink one?" (As she was applying orange and green on my eyelids to my horror) to which she replied "We are trying to make you look younger." OMG! Luckily I could still smile and as it turned out, the orange and green didn't look so bad after all in the photos so they knew what they were doing. I have many wonderful memories of the photo session as well as my wedding. Maybe one day I blog before I turn old and grey and forget.

I suppose there are pros and cons in starting a family late. The greatest challenge is how to continue to provide financially for our still dependant kids when we're old but in the meantime I guess our kids are benefitting from having more mature (as in maturity of mind and not body ok?) parents to guide them from very young. We both were also very ready to start a family making the transition to become parents a lot smoother. I have a few friends who became parents too early and keep having the nagging feeling that they have missed out a lot on life but at least they can retire early!

Birth Order Dynamics

Baby will be turning one in about a month's time. I have no idea what to buy him as a present. Clothes is a no no present for babies. Its soooo boring. A toy. Definitely a toy. But what? He has been playing with all his sister's toys? Must get him his own toy. Just for him. (*makes mental note* and must keep toddler away from his new toy.)

Baby is No.2 (oh definitely not in terms of affection) but merely No.2 in sibling hierachy. No2. grows up with hand-me down clothes and toys and with a ready-made playmate to compete with. (Talking about hand-me down clothes, once Mr MG asked me how come baby was wearing pink pyjamas. :PpP )

No1 on the other hand usually IMHO is a little bossy and a natural leader. Toddler is showing signs of these now. She will say "Come, come baby, I show you how!"

I am the youngest in the family. What does that make me? Spoilt, pampered and manja queen. Hehe. Incidentally Mr MG is also the youngest. So I pamper him, he pamper me loh. (though he's hardly pampered in his family.)

I am the last out of 5. My eldest sis is 8 years my senior and my second last brother is 4 years my senior. So the 4 of my siblings are squeezed into 4 years gap and then along comes MG after 4 years. Quite clearly an accident! But that makes me a little bit of an 'outsider'. Too young to join in the fun and games. No one bothered to 'listen' to me talk. So I became taciturn. Very quiet. As a youngest child, I also had to measure up to expectations. I remember a teacher telling me "Your eldest sister is so good in Art and your middle sister is quite good too but how come your work is like that?" (Ah... stupid teacher, kill a child's self esteem with such a remark!)

I think what determines a person's character is partly influenced by his/her position in the family, whether eldest, middle or youngest child. Check out some of these sites for an interesting read on birth order.

Birth Order
Adlerian Overview of Birth Order Characteristics
Are first born's more successful?

Home is where the heart is

Home is where the heart is and thats where my heart is.

I am happy to be home looking after my little ones. Home to nurture, love and look after them. Even though this means, I never have time for me. Not even a little moment, there is no time for even a little solitude. Everything goes by in a rush. Eating, showering, even going to the toilet. I always have company and am interupted ever so often. When the kids are asleep, I feel torn, I want to spend some time alone or with Mr MG but I also need some sleep. I prefer not to sleep unless I am very tired.

I would very much like to have a slow, long shower, read a novel from cover to cover, watch a show from beginning to end, walk around leisurely.

I am old fashioned. I believe a woman's place is at home. But not many people believe this. Sigh! I guess much as I love to stay at home to look after the little ones, I have to return to work one day to help out with the family finances.

This is my calling, you know. I feel the happiest here, at home. I have been a Conference Manager, very exciting job which I enjoyed and a remisier, a job which I took as just a job. Its not my cup of tea. I do not enjoy it but its an easy job. Its flexible and it helps with the finances. So am I crazy to lose my license to trade? I am told that I must be crazy to give it up because its everyone's dream job. Is it?

I try my best to create a cozy, warm home but guess what? I have just been told that I am more of a burden than help. I am made to feel that I am so inefficient that if I try to do too many things, other things will colaspe or give way. I know this is not true. I am very efficient. I can feed two little mouths and my own all at the same time. I can eat my dinner, feed the kids, wash the dishes, pack the rubbish and do many other things simultaneously. I am very upset right now and the damn microwave door is stuck with my half defrosted chicken inside. I feel like screaming.......

Friends

No, not the sitcom Friends but I'm talking about real friends.

Hmm... lets see, hmmm... ah.... (*count count count*) . I think my only friends are Mr MG and my sisters. Yeah.. so pathetic. Its sad, I don't know how it got this way but my friends are getting fewer and fewer as I grow older and older.

I think friends featured in my life most prominently in my teens and early 20s. I had many friends then. During primary and secondary school, I had lots of friends. We went to each other's homes to bake, chit chat, play Enid Blyton make believe games. We cycled to the beach, we tried out new clothes and hairstyles together, went to the "Disco" for the first time together at 15, went on trips together (first time also at 15. I remember going to Singapore by bus with two other girlfriends. We stayed at one of their cousin's house. Wah felt so "grown up" travelling on our own for the first time. I bought my first pair of high heel shoes then. White ones. Ish! Such bad taste).

I'm glad I was allowed to do all these things ie travel on my own and go places as my dad was quite lenient with me. Hehe. I'm No. 5 mah. First child, very strict, second child, less strict and by the time reach No 5 ie MG, anything goes. No curfew for late night outs as well. (or sometimes early morning coming home :PpP )

MG thinking aloud: Do people still go to discos these days. Haha. Its sounds so out. I think these days it must be pubs, or clubs or coffee places or those mega cinemas. I remember during the good ole days, we went to house parties. Do people still have house parties these days??

During college days, I still had a lot of friends. We played truant together, went on trips, went to each other's house to cook up a meal, went for movies, shopping, swimming, dancing, studied together. It was such fun.

Then everyone started working and thats when my friends started to drift off, slowly one by one. All thats left of my friends then were a few girlfriends and we often met up on Saturdays for shopping and all girls night out for drinks during the weekend. Then slowly one by one got married and there was more drifting off. Then slowly one by one started families and my friends grew fewer and fewer and now whats left is Mr MG and my sisters.

Everyone has their own lives now and we hardly keep in touch and some have even lost touch altogether. Funny, I have very close friends and roomates who live in KL but have never bothered to keep in touch and I have friends who have moved overseas and still keep in touch.

Whats a true friend really? Someone who will always be there for you? Or someone whom when you get together with even after being apart for ages feels like you have never been apart? I guess there's all kinds.

Dunno whats the point of this post but I just feel a little sad that I have almost no friends now. Oh well, with the latest technology, I can have friends just sitting on this chair. Strange, but true.

MG's tip to young people: Enjoy your time with your friends Now. Do all the things that you want to do Now. Go places, go on trips, sing, dance, read, go to discos (err.. sorry coffee places), go shopping, to the movies, go to each other's homes to 'lepak', play games together, tennis, squash, swimming. Have fun. There's so much to see and do. What are you still here for? Go. Scoot. Don't waste time. Go out there and enjoy your friends Now!

Lessons in life.... from blogging.

Firstly, many thanks to all those who took the trouble to share their experience on my previous post. You've been a great help. Thats what I like about blogging. High 5 all!

I'm learning so much from blogging... so much more than I ever could from say, reading the newspaper, a book or even talking with my circle of friends or relatives. Why? Because of this open sharing of real life experiences and because my circle of friends is not wide enough to include people almost 20 years younger or 10 years older than me the way some of my blogging buddies are.

Bloggers share their real life experiences about anything under the sun. They share the good books they read, good music, good movies, good food, latest techy gizmos. They talk about love, studies, work, death, religion. And everyone speaks in their blogs about things they like or dislike with such passion and enthusiasm. Whether its in praise or merely ranting and raving about something they're writing about, the outpouring of thoughts and feelings is what makes reading blogs so interesting.

Not only that, the diversity of opinions on a single subject matter is amazing . We can have people from all races and ages discussing and sometimes disagreeing about the same issue. And, there is free sharing of information, good links, and articles on almost any conceivable subject you can think about.

You cannot get this anywhere else but on blogs. They say the pen is mightier than the sword and I say the pen tells a lot more than the lips. I find people to be a lot more expressive when they pen what they have to say. Face to face, sometimes the tongue is tied. Ah.. I do love blogging so. I guess there may be some time in my life when I may not be able to blog but in the meantime, blogworld, don't leave me out, I'm here to blog, blog, blog and comment, comment, comment.

Chinese School or National School?

Disclaimer: I'm just a mother seeking the best education for my child. No political discussion please. If you want to discuss politics, please go someplace else. Thank you.

Although my children are still young, I have been thinking about this issue and am feeling a little confused by the conflicting feedback I have been receiving from friends and relatives. Some of the comments I have heard include:

"With China having opened its doors to the world economically, I see further advantage for a proper Chinese education."
"I send my child to Chinese School because it is more strict and disciplined."
"I regret sending my child to Chinese School. It is too stressful for me and my child."
"My child cannot cope in the Chinese School environment. There is too much work. He/She has to do schoolwork till the wee hours of the morning. Next year I will switch to National School/send my younger children to National School."
"My child hates Chinese School. We don't speak Mandarin at home so he/she cannot catch up."
"I cannot help my child with his/her schoolwork because I don't understand Mandarin."
"I cannot help my child with his/her schoolwork because the Malay is too deep for me."
"I sent my child to National School but I have to send him/her for extra Mandarin tuition."
"Chinese School students perform better academically."
"Chinese School environment is too competitive for my child because of the focus on being better academically."
"I sent my child to Chinese primary school. Now he/she cannot cope with the Malay in National Secondary school so I have to send him/her for extra Malay tuition or he/she will have bad grades."
"The class size in my child's Chinese/National school is too huge."

Blah, blah, blah..... There is more but I can't remember them right now. I am from National School and I found no problem with that. My only regret is I am Chinese but I don't understand Mandarin and I think being able to converse and read Chinese is useful. So parents with school going children and young people from Chinese/National Schools, please give your views and share your experience. Now shoot.

What Kind Of A Blogger Are You?

Found this quiz while jalan-jalan around the web. Wanna try?

You Are a Life Blogger!

Your blog is the story of your life - a living diary. If it happens, you blog it. And make it as entertaining as possible.

What kind of blogger are you?

I'm in shape... round is a shape!

I'm soooo unfit. My current lifestyle is too sedentary. After all, how much exercise can one get carrying a baby and chasing a toddler around less than 1000 square feet of space. I need some exercise. I'm turning into a couch potato, only my 'couch' is the chair I'm sitting on right now.

I really admire those who can make exercise part of their day and maintain it that way. Me? I'm too lazeeeeee. I think it takes a lot of effort and self discipline to maintain an exercise routine. Oh.. I've had my days at Aerobic classes, swimming, jogging, running around picking up tennis balls, but they're like seasonal exercises. Easy come easy go.

Mr MG and I got a stationary bike a little while ago as thats the only exercise we can hope to have with a baby and toddler around. We thought about it really hard because as you grow older you realise that you can no longer take your health for granted. We need exercise, good food and good sleep. The Food and Sleep part is easy but the exercise? Well the stationary bike is collecting dust. Hmm...maybe wiping the dust off the bike can be considered exercise??

I long to have the feeling I get after a good workout. The kind of tired but relaxed feeling. But in order to get that feeling, I would have to do some 5-10 minutes warm up, at least 20 minutes working real hard to meet my target heart rate and a further 5-10 minutes cooling down and then off to a nice sweet smelling shower. Oooh it feels good just thinking about it but I do not have the luxury of time. I would be huffing and puffing at the bike and then baby goes "Waaaah!" (I want my breastfeed). Toddler is easier to handle. I can just bark orders to her from the bike.

Of course baby is older now and requires less breastfeeds but I'm still using that lame excuse.... Somebody please come and scold me. Tell me to get off my 'couch' and go and get some exercise at least 3 times a week 20 minutes each time. Help! Help! I need to improve my fitness, my health and of course my figure. I'm 20 pounds heavier than my previous self now while Mr MG looks exactly the same as the day we got married. Its not fair. Help! I don't want to look like his older sister. Help! Help! Help!

MG's tip to single young ladies: Marry a man at least 5 years older. You see, its very unfair but men tend to age more gracefully than us ladies. After a while, if you're not careful, your other half will start to look like your younger brother.

Hmmrph! (Even toddler cannot recognise MG in the wedding photo at the head of our bed. She pointed happily to "daddy" in the picture then hesistated and MG had to tell her "Thats mummy!" *rolls eyes*)

Blog Talk

There is something new in the Malaysian Blogging Scene. Its the Malaysian Bloggers Forum by LiewCF. So if you have a blog and you feel like talking about the What, Where, Why and How of Blogging, do hop over there to have a look. You need to register to join in the discussion.

If you haven't seen the site (though quite a number of you have), here's a sneak preview of some of the discussion rooms.

Announcement & Feedback

Bloggers Community - Communication between local bloggers.
Helps and Tips - Get helps on blogging and share your blogging tips
Mamak - General discussion. Chat and post anything you like here.
Sub-Forums: Movies/TV, Music, Computer/Gadgets, Food
Events and Gatherings - Post your blogger events and gatherings here.

Blog Sites
Member Blogs - Share your blog site here and get feedback from other bloggers.
Cool Blogs - Found a nice blog? Share here.

Blog Resouces - Resources for you to get start blogging
Blogger(BlogSpot)
Transfer Posts & Archives
MovableType & TypePad
WordPress
TextPattern
Others - Discussion and help about other blogging scripts/softwares
Blog Template/Skin - Give your blog a beautiful look.
Blog Add-ons - add-on to add features to your blog. Counter, commenter, shoutbox, etc.

Products and Services Promotion

At the time I publish this post, the statistics are as follows.

Malaysia Bloggers Forum Statistics
Threads: 86, Posts: 533, Members: 94

Not bad for a 3 day old forum don't you think? So why not hop over there to discuss about your blog and blogging with other like minded bloggers. Ok. Thats MG's little bit of marketing for the day. See you there.

I will be happy when.....

I almost forgot that I said I would blog about the "Happy NOW" concept.

There's this email going around that says "I will be happy when.... I get that job I want, the kids are grown up etc etc." I can't quite remember what reasons they gave so I made up my own reasons but anyway it got me thinking. Its true, its very easy to get caught up in this "I will be happy when...."

For eg. when you have kids, you may say "I will be happy when.....

- the baby is born (while pregnant)
- the baby can walk and talk (so I can have more free time)
- the toddler will outgrow the "terrible twos"
- my teenager will grow up!
- my this and that... (the list can go on and on)

I think thats really a very silly attitude. When you are bringing up children, there will be many challenges (I prefer to call them challenges rather than problems) along the way. Why look at them as problems and wish for some time in the future?

Be Happy NOW!

Enjoy your kids NOW! They grow up so fast. (That reminds me, baby has just got his two lower front teeth. I'm so going to miss his toothless grins.)

And be Happy NOW in whatever you are doing and at whichever part of your life you are living now, not later when...

Be Happy with the choices you've made. Never look back and regret. Look ahead and enjoy the present.

Life is short. Make it sweet.. every step of the way!

Heh heh. Thats MG's "Happy Now" concept and philosophical blog for the day. I must try to remember what I blogged today especially when the going gets tough.

P.S. Its supposed to be International Women's Day today, I think. Well, whether it is or not, here's a little something for all the ladies.

Night Owl and Early Bird

I'm a night person. I am usually very wide awake and perky at night and in the daytime, well, I can sleep till noon, till the sun shines on my bum and says "Wakey! Wakey! You sleepyhead!" No, night persons are not lazy people, we are just wired that way. I'm very alert and do my best work at night. When I was a student, I would burn the midnight oil because thats my best time to absorb and learn new things.

When I was working, I would hit the snooze button again and again, skip breakfast, brush teeth, get dressed and put on warpaint in 5-10 minutes, drive like a madwoman and arrive at the office in the nick of time. Thats me.

Mr MG on the other hand is a morning person. The kind that jumps right out of bed all chirpy and ready to greet the day. The kind that takes a shower, have breakfast and arrive at the office before everyone else, the kind that wakes up early even during weekends. It took me a while to get used to that. As I'm sure it took him a while to get used to my love to sleep-in in the mornings.

Oh well, they say opposites attract right? I did say once before that we're as different as night and day and that goes for our biological clock too. Well, I'm night and he's day. I'm the night owl and he's the early bird.We could have wars about this if we choose to but luckily we have come up with the concept of "I take care of you, you take care of me." like in the cowboy movies where they would take turns looking out for enemies so we too will take turns looking after the other, making sure the other is properly tucked under the blankets, not feeling too cold etc. Its a nice feeling. And we have our own quiet time alone too, Mr MG in the morning and MG at night.

Of course, now I don't have the luxury of waking at noon and sometimes I conk out when the kiddoes do because I'm too tired but thats really against my biological clock. Mr MG's body clock is also upset by the kid sometimes. Ahh babies, they are such tiny, innocent little beings but boy oh boy do the have a BIG impact on our lives.

For other night persons like me, here's a link for you.

And The Winner Is......

MG does not blog during the weekends because weekends usually very, very busy plus must make way for Mr MG and his PC game. (Aiyah. MG kasi chance lah, the man only gets to use the PC in the evenings and during the weekends...Kesian...)

Sunday afternoon (everyone sleeping but baby doesn't want to sleep. Hmm... what to do? OK, lets read some blogs.....

(*tap tap tap clickety clackety tap tap click*)
MG checks her Bloglines blog feeds to see which blog to catch up on.

(*drum roll*)
Ta Daaaaa

And The Winner Is......

• Mrs T with 6 updates
• 5XMom with 4 updates
• Jason with 3 updates

P.S. Sorry, no prizes or trophies for the winners but here's wishing you are showered with 100,000 hits and become an A-list blogger, 10,000 repeat visitors and 1,000 interesting comments to keep you going. May your blog traffic grow and keep on going up, up and away!

Ok, time to go blog catching up now. See ya.

You are tracked!

I am... errr was a new kid, I mean (*ahem*) Ah Soh on the blog. (Wait ah? I check my sidebar). Wah 6 months blogging adi, not so new now. The longer I blog, the more good blogs I come across that I want to follow/read and comment.

Hmm... so many good blogs to read, so little time. What to do? Must get one of those news/blog reader thingy. But I don't want to download anything on my PC. The more I download, the more risk there is for virus and spyware on my pc making it so slloooooow to load webpages. Then kenot blog, how? (We've got antivirus protection, Spybot Search & Destroy and Ad-Aware but theres still a risk.... especially for a non-it savvy Ah Soh like me. (with a half past six knowledge) Hmm.... what to do? (*search search search*)

Okie. Found solution adi. Ah Soh got herself another freebie, a web-based news aggregator or reader from Bloglines. Its so easy to use too. I like it. So, everyone on my sidebar, you have just been tracked. (I'm happy that I've managed to subscribe to all your great blogs so that I will know each time you update your pages without having to go and check your blogs again and again. Ah Soh very busy wan, no time to check so many times.)

Note: If you are a silent reader of my blog or if you have a good blog, please own up. Now that I have my blog reader up I can follow more blogs in less time.
(half past six = a term to denote incompetence)

Baby is mobile!

No, Baby has not yet learned to crawl, he can gostan (crawl backwards) a little, but not forward.

No, Baby has not yet learned to walk.

And yet when I put him down in a sitting position with his back against the sofa, I find him watching TV right in front of the TV a moment later!

Funny! He has learned to do his very own backside shuffle to move around the room and can even change directions.

At first, Baby disliked being put on his tummy but he is beggining to enjoy it a little bit more now. When his daddy puts him on the tummy and pushes him forward, he would laugh aloud, very excitedly and gleefully. How exciting it must be for a baby to be mobile for the first time! And how exciting it is to watch his wonder and excitement! It makes the night shift all the more worthwhile.

Night Shift

A mother's job is 24/7.

As Mr MG prepares to go to bed, MG prepares herself for the night shift but before the night shift begins must get the kids to bed first.

Going to bed

Baby has a viral infection and is feeling miserable. That means he needs lots of tender loving care. He has trouble falling asleep because he feels uncomfortable. Normally a simple breastfeed while telling toddler her bedtime stories would do the job and then he would sleep like a.... well, like a baby.

But due to the fever and his slightly gassy stomach, he is screaming in discomfort, his tiny fingers gripping my arm, little fingernails digging into my flesh, his face all red and he is arching his little body. So no choice, have to walk him up and down to distract him and help him to sleep. Baby seldom gets this luxury of being walked up and down but since he is not feeling well.....

Toddler is jealous to see the attention baby is getting. To avoid this, we go and fetch her teddy bear so she could walk up and down with the bear as well (instead of bugging me to carry her) and so we both walked up and down the room. It took 3 rounds of pacing the floor before baby slept and toddler stopped feeling jealous and went to sleep too. Not 3 rounds round the room mind you. (Defination of 1 round = walk up and down, up and down then put baby down "Waaaaaah!" more nail digging, back arching, face turning red). Normally baby is very good but since he is sick thats the way he tells me he is not feeling well since he can't talk yet.

Night Shift Begins

Toddler woke up crying non-stop. Uh Oh! Usually that means a nightmare or coming down with a virus. (I thought baby would be the first one to wake up. ) It took some time to calm her down and in the meantime baby woke up. Took him out to check his diaper. Nothing there.

A moment later.... phhuuut! phhuut! Uh Oh! Baby needs a diaper change now. The doc did say to watch out for loose stools so here it comes. After the change, toddler goes back to sleep and baby had to be walked up and down again.

Much later.... Thud! Waaaaaah! (Toddler fell off the bed) Luckily we haven't thrown away that cheap mattress at the end of the bed to cushion any fall. Calms toddler down but baby woke up again. Luckily this time he went back to sleep after a breastfeed.

Much..much..later... Waaaaahhh! This time its baby who needs comforting again. Walk up and down, up and down. Its early morning now but normally baby sleeps in late so have to get him back to sleep.

Much..much...much...later... Mummy! (Toddler wakes up.) Waaaaahhhh! (Baby wakes up.)

Night shift over liao. Day shift about to start.

Usually day shift is more heavy duty except for the lack of sleep at night. Normally its not so bad though. Its quite easy to get them to bed and toddler usually sleeps through the night; but when one is sick... thats what happens lah.

Note: After the Day shift over, night shift started again, with a near repeat of the earlier night except for the part where toddler fell off the bed. MG got panda eyes adi.

I HATE dentists! (Part II)

This is a continuation from the previous post.

I had eight of my upper front teeth fixed. Fixed meaning capped. I tortured myself by going to the dentist week after week after week over something some stranger said to me.

The dentist took before and after photos of me (or rather my teeth). I never looked at them. First she made a mold of my original teeth, then we selected the desired colour from a catalogue, much like choosing the colour of hair dye when you want to highlight your hair. Eventually, we decided on two shades so it would look more natural. 6 white ones in front and 2 not so white behind. The dentist proudly proclaimed to me "You know, I have done several solid gold caps on special request before." (Its beyond me, why anyone would want to have gold teeth?)

Then she started to drill off my original tooth until only stumps were left. I almost flinched in horror when she showed me the stumps. "What have I done??!" My dentist liked to listen to music and hum along as she worked so the session would go something like this.

Equipment: *drill drill drill*
Dentist: *hum hum hum*
MG: *ahh ahh ahh*
Dentist: Painful?
MG: *mmpph mmpph mmpph* (How to talk with drill in mouth?)

I had to wear a temporary mold over those stumps and walk around like that for a while. After the original cap was ready, the dentist put them over the stumps and cemented them. "They're like your original teeth now. You can brush and treat them as though they are your teeth but avoid biting into apples, sugar canes and other hard stuff." she told me. Then she told me that my gums were in bad shape and she had to do something about them. So, she gave me some painful injections and.....

Equiment: *slice slice slice* (cutting the gums into "shape")
Dentist: *hum hum hum*
Equipment: *sew sew sew* (sewing back some of the gums to close them up over the teeth)
Dentist: *hum hum hum*

After that.... ta da.... I had a brand new several thousand Ringgit flashing new smile which I used in full force on all those forced posed studio wedding photos I took. (I still had to practise smiling without showing the lower teeth but thats a lot easier than smiling without showing any teeth).

But one evening....many years later.... at a cocktail function at work.... one of the caps dropped out! (horror of horrors). I had to slip it back on and kept quiet the rest of the evening hoping I wouldn't swallow my own tooth! It was a weekend too. So I had to keep the tooth till Monday before I could get it cemented back. I still have nightmares about that one! Especially since gums recede with age and sometimes some of the caps feel lose. (Ish! Don't want to think about that).

Recently, when I visited the dentist on the advice of my gynae while I was pregnant with baby to have my tooth decay fixed, the dentist told me....

Dentist: "You know, these days we have a much simpler procedure for whitening teeth."
MG: "You mean, like using those Colgate paint on the teeth like that ah?"
Dentist: "Something like that"

Aaaarrhhh! Geram! (And to think I had 8 of my original God given teeth drilled to stumps!) Now do you know why I hate dentists??! (Probably more than the average person).

Well, thats the extent of "Cosmetic" surgery I will ever do, thank you very much. I am not going to do a thing about the several chins that I have, or the laughing buddha type of belly or them hanging papayas. So there! (No Botox for me, nosiree. One just has to come to terms with one's aging body, especially after childbirth but apparently more and more women are choosing to go under the knife these days.)