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Friday, January 16, 2009

"Daddy and Mummy sayang me at home."

After school yesterday, my girl looked happier. When I asked her how was school, she said it was ok. She said that when she felt bad, she thought about home and she thought about "daddy and mummy sayang me at home" and she felt better. That was what we had been telling her. We said that we will always support her and no matter what she can come home to her family where daddy and mummy will sayang her. She then asked "What is support?" Support means being there for you always sweetiepie. lol.

She said that her teacher said that she will give her a present because she sat up really, really straight and didn't move at all when told to do so.

She was also happy that she made a new friend. "Mummy, I cried and got a new friend!" I told her "Thats not the way to make new friends", and that made her giggle non-stop. In my previous post, I mentioned that this new friend is in the same position as her. She doesn't speak much Mandarin unlike the other children. This new friend had been crying for the whole of the first week whereas my girl was ok. Now she is ok and so she went to my girl and said "I will be your friend" and that made my girl happy. The girl's mother and I had gotten together and we are trying to encourage our girls to become friends.

However, during bedtime, it was back to "I don't want to go to school."

This morning as soon as she woke up she said "Mummy, please remember to pack some newspapers for me to bring to school." They are having some recycling project at the school and the first day that the teacher told the kids to bring newspaper to school, most of them turned up with a stack of papers but a few, like my girl, did not, because they did not understand the instructions.

So yesterday, we packed some for her to bring to school because she said that her teacher says that those who did not bring MUST bring the next day. Today, she said, the teacher said they are supposed to bring more papers today. Hopefully, she got the instructions right. We packed the papers for her anyway since it is so important to her that it is the first thing she uttered when she woke up. She must have been thinking about it all night!

During breakfast, she said "Mummy, I don't want to go to school." again and before she went out the door, she wanted to be hugged and looked tearful but the tears were less this time and she managed to control it well.

Again, I stress the importance of preparing our kids for conversational chinese so that they feel more comfortable and less of a culture shock and change. My girl has not so much trouble in reading and writing. She can copy words of songs etc that the teacher writes on the board and can understand some, not all of it. She had top marks in her kindy class for Mandarin but of course top marks does not get you anywhere in getting along with others and being able to adjust into a new environment etc. Those are important living skills which we must teach our children.

I will never insist that my children score top marks. What I would insist upon is that they try. If they don't try, then they will not be able to improve on anything. If they try, then even if they don't do it so well, they would at least have gotten over the first barrier and taken the first steps towards improvement. Try first and then practise, practise, practise because practise makes perfect. That is what I tell my girl all the time. I talk to her like an adult because I think children understand more than we give them credit for sometimes.

I have one question to ask everyone. This has to do with streaming. When classes are streamed. Which do you think is better for your kids. Do you think its important to be in the top classes simply because the teachers are supposed to be better and more qualified? Do you think its better to be mediocre in top classes or top student in second rate or lower streamed classes? Or you don't think its important to give it any thought. Just let your child go with the flow.


  1. Glad that your girl has got a new friend in school! It's also good to see that you have put in lotsa efforts in her Mandarin! :) I do ponder about your question, for me, I think that alot really depends on the child. Perhaps I'm more 'bochap'. :P

  2. I also talk to my girl like an adult and also insist that she must give in 100% effort to try and not to give up before even trying. I'm not those that aim for high marks too. What is important is the knowledge gained.

    As for streaming, I used to ponder about it, but now I just let JS takes her own lead. I won't push her to be in the top class, we will try our best to achieve good grades but not for the sake for to be put in the top class. I think it won't be that bad in normal class as long as not the last class where mainly everyone is really slow and lazy and trouble kids.

    Being in the top class also means pressure from other parents and teachers are teaching in a faster pace, whether is better teacher or not, I'm not sure.

    Wait till the time comes (that will be next year) then only I start worry and ponder about it again.

  3. Hmmmm...now i start to worried about my boys when they start standard one.

    Good info to share, at least i know what i am going to do when my boys go to Primary school.

  4. You're such a good mother.... Anyway, top class doesn't determine how successful a person can be in future. Most importantly, is the attitude of a person. Even if you're the top student but with bad attitude, your life won't be successful anyway because nobody will like you and you have no chance to show what you capable of.

  5. blurblur,
    I think its good to bochap. This way we create less stress for ourselves and our children. lol.

    Yah, you are probably right. Somewhere in the middle would be good. They talked about streaming the other day. I think they mentioned something about a top class and the rest being equal something like that but I'm not sure. Like my girl, I don't understand whats going on! Hahaha.

    Annie Q,
    I see the boys in my girl's class are all having fun. I think boys adapt more easily.

    Thank you for reminding me that as parents we should shape their attitude. Attitude is certainly more important than academic performance. :)

  6. So good to read the initial part of the post - your daughter is doing better. Glad she has got a friend.

    As for the streaming, sad to say that the top classes indeed to get the better teachers. But if overall the Chinese school teachers are alright, then I would say Go with the flow....in kebangsaan school, have to do well so that you can a resemblance of some education ! :)

  7. of course i wld like my kids to be in the top class not because teachers are better, but because i personally think that top classes move faster and kids learn more. but i will let my children go with the flow cause i dont wanna put pressure on them. lots of homework everyday is stress enuff plus i rather stress them on UPSR, PMR, etc instead of in Std123. but then who knows when the time comes


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