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Thursday, November 27, 2008



Are boys lazier than girls?

I'm wondering if boys are lazier than girls. I've had no problems teaching my girl. She loves learning and she soaks up information like a sponge. She has a photographic memory and can often remember shows or books that she reads word for word. Its amazing.

She learned her ABCs almost by herself. I taught her a couple of times and then she would practise by herself and soon she knew them all. We have the whole set of Peter and Jane books and when I teach her to read using them, we would go through book after book till she completed all in the series almost without turning back.

Even now that she is older, she loves home lessons. I can give her some instructions and she would do the work eagerly. All she needs is some reward stickers to make her happy.

Its a different story with my boy though. Whenever I teach him, sometimes he would grumble and say "Tired...." He's learning to read the Peter and Jane books but we can't move on. We keep on going back to books 1 and 2 over and over again because he can't remember.

Last night he threw two of the books that we were currently reading down the bed when I was not looking. I found them because he and his sister were looking under the bed at the numerous toys and other stuff that he threw in there.

When I asked him why he threw the book under his bed, he said he didn't want to read them. So he threw them in there so I couldn't find them! When I told his dad about that, his dad said "Smart boy". Hmmm...... and he is the one who is always asking me to give more attention to the boy and make sure that he is not left behind in his lessons compared to his sister.

What to do now? I don't want to turn him off learning. His dad said he should be pushed a little so that he doesn't take it easy all the time. He hasn't outgrown his mirror image writing so we want to make sure that we spend time teaching him but he is lazy to learn. He is going to be 5 in April 2009. To me he is still a baby and I shouldn't be worried but his paeditrician had wanted to have him screened for dyslexia some months ago when we visited her. Eventually she agreed to wait a few months till he starts school to see his progress. I guess that is why his dad is always asking me to push him a little but I don't want to punish or scold him if he is lazy to learn. I don't want him to learn because he HAS to, I want him to learn because he WANTS to.

13 comments:

  1. Actually, most boys find it hard to "sit still and learn". I have a different situation than yours, my boy is keen to learn and he has great concentration. But my gal, not sure if she's still young, doesn't show the same interests if I "use the same methods" as her brother. I have to be more creative in teaching her about colors, shapes, reading, coloring and etc. I guess it's different for every child.

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  2. I find the same for children too. I can teach my girl, but I can't use the same method for my boy. He is just not interested. I don't think they are lazy, we just have to take a different approach. Something that can catch their attention. I think I am the one who is lazy to try other method, *sigh*...

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  3. I have two boys (6 & 4). My elder one is soaks up everything like a sponge, while my younger one tends to be playful. I heard from my friend that kids born under the monkey zodiac sign are more playful...I am beginning to wonder if this is true! More patience is needed when I deal with him especially when it comes to following instructions.

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  4. my son is like that too! he is more playful than his sister and whenever I want to teach him to read, he will read the first few words, and close the book and tell me "FINISH!"

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  5. Hi MG, dont worry about the dyslexia, i think maybe the paediatrician just wants to get some money frm the screen? i think he's alright and he's just acting his age, especially he is a boy!

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  6. I don't know. All I know is...they learn in a different way. They cannot, absorb like girls. Did you know..that in a mixed class, boys will tend to lag behind only becoz they don't want to show their 'slowness' in front of girls?

    I find, talking to my boys..as we are working on something is easier than talking directly.

    My eldest also had mirror image writing when he was younger..but it got corrected..somehow. Ah..boys!

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  7. MG,
    with me it's contrary. The boys are MORE dilligent then the girl.

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  8. shoppingmum,
    Maybe its their age then. The younger ones prefer to play. I should probably just let him play till he is ready to learn. Haha.

    Annie,
    I am lazy to try new methods too. :P

    Ai-Ling,
    Sounds like you are describing my monkey boy too. Hehe.

    Something About Us,
    Haha. Another smart boy you have there. At least he doesn't try to hide the book under the bed. lol.

    Leeyen,
    Oh, its not that the paeditrician wanted to get money from the screening. She is a very dedicated one. When I had breastfeeding problems she spent hours with me for free! She even called me up at home to support me. She was suggesting to refer us to a psychologist instead which worries me just a little bit.

    mott,
    You should know. You are the rose among thorns. Hehe.

    henny,
    So its not a gender thing afterall. :)

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  9. Just wondering... if he is dyslexic, that could be the reason why he doesn't like learning. It's difficult for him to read because he doesn't see the letters like we do. I may be wrong but thought it's something to consider.

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  10. Lian,
    Yes, I thought about that too but anyhow I will wait and see since he is still quite young at 4 going on 5. Thanks. :)

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  11. i hate to say this because i have 2 boys of my own, but they are WITHOUT A DOUBT lazier. i have so many friends that have only girls that don't experience the "laziness" factor. but i will say, i can't remember having to deal with "meltdowns"!

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  12. As someone who was once a young boy eager to learn, I hate that my disinclination toward "busy work" is always perceived as laziness. At the end of a tedious process, boys often need to have something tangible they can have pride in to show off their accomplishment. The self-gratification from something like reading a series of books start to finish just isn't there because the reward is entirely internal.

    Experiential learning and experimentation are really great ways to stimulate young minds that have a difficult time focusing on reading. I can't tell you how to best implement that in your case, but discovering new things through the process of trial, failure, and success is, at least for me, an immensely more gratifying way to gain knowledge.

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  13. This is not about laziness. Whether children want to do what you want them to do is a matter of preference. That girls are naturally more sedentary and therefore more likely to want to read does not make them hard-working. Boys are more energetic and want to be involved in physical activities. You might as well say that girls are lazy because all they want to do is sit down and read instead of running round using physical energy.

    Incidentally, it hardly matters what age you learn to read at. Someone who learnt to read at 9 is, at 13, indistinguishable from a contemporary who learnt at 5. Only the school system, with its obsession on grading and comparing, makes a problem.
    Michael Steane

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