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Wednesday, January 26, 2005



Phobia

They say its better to do it after the babies fall asleep.
They say its better to do it right after a bath.
I prefer to do it wide awake, preferable with lots of lighting.
Still, I get cold sweats and my hands start trembling.
Its really nerve racking.
But I never used to feel this way........
I was really confident when I did it.
I always got it right the first time every time.
I had a firm grip and I did it decisively.
But all that has changed.... since that day I drew blood.

Yup, I've lost all confidence to trim babies nails now.

I've had no problems holding on to babies cute, chubby little fingers firmly and clipping the nails decisively until one day....... "Waaaahhhhhhhh" (Ouch!) I had accidentally trimmed some skin and flesh. And I had trimmed down very hard too thinking it was the nails. (My poor baby!) Baby cried and I cried harder. (Bad mummy! Bad mummy!) I ran around frantically trying to decide whether to put antiseptic, a plaster, put the little finger under running water or what??? Should I take baby to the paeditrician? I checked to see if the nail clipper was rusty, a thousand things running through my mind. What if baby developed an infection from the wound? What if this....? What if that? Yikes. Anyway, here's what to do in case of a cut.

We parents worry about every little thing, worse when we are the ones whose carelessness inflicted the pain in the first place. The self-blame that takes place is HUGE!!! Now, I can't trim the nails anymore without fear. I've developed a phobia. Gosh. And they grow so fast, those little fingernails. They have to be trimmed weekly or more often or else "scratch. scratch" (themselves and anybody else nearby). Hmmm... babies nails look long now. I've been in avoidance again, I think.

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