Good Guy Bad Guy

I've learned from many couple friends and relatives that when they try to discipline their child, they often end up with one of them playing the "good guy" and the other one will be the "bad guy" ie one spouse will be the disciplinarian.... the one who scolds etc and the other one is the one with the softer touch ie the one who comforts and says "its ok". The one with the so called softer touch need not necessarily be the mommy in this case.

Well, hubby and I try not to fall into this trap. So far I've noticed that none of us is clearly the good guy/bad guy. We play both equally ie we scold and love them equally and the one who does the scolding will do the comforting as well when everything has cooled down. Its hard, but we made a pact not to interfere when the other is doing the scolding. This is really not that easy though because when you're not the one doing the scolding sometimes you may feel your partner is being too harsh and you want to rush in to protect the child. This happens to both of us equally, I think. We try not to let it happen too often because then the child will get confused with the mixed signals.

I think the worse thing that can happen is when your spouse is scolding the child, you rush to comfort the child and scold your spouse in front of the child, then you and your partner end up arguing in front of the child. This has happened to us before but hmmm..... we really have to stick to our pact of non-interference.

What about you? Who's the good guy/bad guy in your relationship?