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Wednesday, September 07, 2005



Reflections of a SAHM - Part 2

"I'm just a housewife." she said softly almost apologetically, her head slightly downcast.

Hehehe. Thats certainly not going to be the response you get from me if you meet up with me. Back when I was working, I remember when I met up with old classmates some of which have become very successful at work, some of which have become housewives and while the corporates were passing their business cards around, the housewives answer was as above. Ok! Ok! I exagerated but the gist is that they were not proud of the fact that they were housewives. Why ever not?! I can't understand that.

I'm certainly not ashamed or embarassed of the fact that I'm a housewife, staying home to look after my kids and my home. The response I often get when I tell ppl that I'm a housewife is:

  • "Wah. You have the good life." or "Enjoy life lah you."
  • "Wah! You goyang kaki lah. So good"
  • "You can tahan ah? Stay at home all day? The kids don't drive you up the wall?"
  • "Don't you feel bored?"
  • "Good lah you. Made such a sacrifice."
  • "Don't you feel that your skills are wasted staying at home?"

Well, they're all wrong. Its not a big, great sacrifice. Why should it be? I love to look after my kids myself. I'd like to be there for them, now when they are young and need a lot of care and attention and later on I'd like to be there for them when they get home from school with a hot lunch waiting and someone to chat with. I enjoy being with them. How can anyone call it a sacrifice?

Its not "the good life". Being a full time housewife is no easy job but of course I enjoy life. Life is short. I would try to enjoy life anyway, whether I'm working or otherwise.

Goyang kaki? More time? Hahaha. I had lots lots more time when I was working. Why! I had one full hour for lunch! One of my jobs was not deskbound so I felt I had even more time. (Sometimes I had to be at several places at the same time but thats ok because in between appointments can steal some time. Heh heh!) Now, I still have to be at several places at the same time, only... I can't steal some time with these bosses. In fact, I'll be happy if I had some time to have a long bath and an uninterupted meal and theres never any time to read the papers.

Skills wasted? I have many skills, yes (Hehe. Blowing own trumpet. All of us have our skills yes or not?) Do I fear that they are "wasted". Not at all. My skills are being put to the best use of all. For people that matter to me most. They're being used to teach, nurture and guide my children. Of course they're not being paid for financially but not everything is about money. And I'm never afraid that I can put my skills to work again should the situation arise or call for it. Once you have a skill, its always there. I have a good work attitude and I'm always eager to learn new things so I shall always be employable should I choose to be. (This is for mums who want to stay at home but feel afraid to take the step.)

Bored? Hahaha. Hardly! I don't have time to be bored. So next time, anyone tells you they are a housewife, please, puh...leaze don't give them any of the above responses. Now, I'm BORED with those responses because they're so cliche, unoriginal and inaccurate, YOU HEAR ME??!!


11 comments:

  1. SAHM is a great profession and they are slowly getting extinct..
    Keep it up mumsgather!
    oops.. my wife is pestering me liao to make enough to service our loans so she can also take up SAHM full-time..

    ReplyDelete
  2. Though I'm working fulltime, I take weekends and off-days just to feel how it feels like to be a SAHM. That's one of the reasons, I stick to my no-maid policy!
    I love being with my girls, cook for my family, take care of the house...love doing it on my own.
    That's why I think no SAHM should feel sorry/ashamed etc, be proud instead. And i agree with you...it is not a sacrifice!
    But at the same time...I do enjoy my job and don't have any plan to quit!

    ReplyDelete
  3. egghead, help! I belong to an extinct species???

    mama22beas, good for you! then your kids has the best of both worlds. anyway, whatever it is we mums choose to do, its important that 1) we are happy with our choice and 2) we must not forget that we are mums first above all else. The little ones grow up so fast and theres only that many hours in a day. If we don't spend time with them now, then when?

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  4. SAHM are not extinct, it's just not many women willing / able to take the big step. I enjoy being part-time-working aka part-time-SAHM. It's enjoyable cleaning up my baby's poo-poo, messy clothes, picking up things he throws, etc. But I have to learn how to cook to qualify for SAHM lah. :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. shoppingmum is right, not many woman willing instead. i can tell that i have to work 365 days x 24 hrs a day as a SAHM but am happy with it.

    ReplyDelete
  6. shoppingmum, haha. you want cooking lessons? My fee very cheap only. kekeke.

    siaulin, most days, 24 hours not enuf. lol.

    chrissy, izzit? when? when? hehe.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Being a SAHM is just another choice of work for a woman, no? You choose to work in an office, I choose to work at home - I don't remark you are making a HUGE sacrifice to work for someone else and not spend time with your kids...(being b*tchy today, aren't we..). Sigh.. just really tired of explaning myself. Nowadays I just hook up with like-minded people; like you, dear MG! BTW, I do too have 'business' cards... (with the prerequisite name, add, phone no and email..homemade of course, we mustn't waste our computer skills. And we are very bored and goyang kaki-mah!!)

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hehehe. KC feeling bitchy, bored and goyang kaki today, thats why comment on my blog.

    ReplyDelete
  9. my sentiment, my sentiment, *sob sob*...
    I a bit bitchy sometime, if ppl say: "wha...goyang kaki lor..." my respond is: "ya lor, so syiok, no need to see the boss's face, no need to wipe adult shit, no need to polish adult shoe, damn syiok, pity you still have to do all this, you no fook-hei like me lar."
    *evil smile*...

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  10. "No need to wipe adult shit." Classic. LOL.

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