The Magic Cup

Tuesday night My Boy could not sleep after his feed because I did not get the timing right. Timing is of essence here. My Boy must be just a little bit sleepy but not too sleepy during his feed and he will fall asleep contentedly. Otherwise, I will have a fully charged, active baby to deal with.

So there I lay half asleep listening to My Girl chatting non-stop. All I could hear as I struggled to stay awake was "Daddy..... repair.... no batteries..... the golden car.... there at the kitchen there....why....mummy...." With my eyes half opened, I watched as My Boy clambered off the bed, his bottom and feet first. Then he toddled over to the shelf and took a lone toy cup (dunno what its doing in the bedroom) and came back to the foot of bed, his eyes pleading me to carry him up again. (Because the bed is too tall for him to climb up on his own, no problem getting down though.)

I took my time to carry him back to bed and then he was off again trying to climb down. This time, he stopped halfway on his tummy, his feet dangling in the air as if undecided whether to continue his descent or to climb up again. My Girl stopped her chatter momentarily to laugh at his antics. Luckily he decided that the smarter choice would be to climb up as lazy mummy may not carry him up again.

This time, he came and sat next to my head, he played with my hair and face before giving the toy cup his full attention, turning it this way and that, dropping it and picking it up again. He pretended to drink from it, then offered to feed me with it. He tried to clamber over me to reach his sister but when he found that his obstacle (me) was too difficult, he gave up and went back to his cup.

Meanwhile, his sister chatted on and on as I struggled to fight my sleepiness. After a time, I saw that his sister had fallen asleep and a little while later My Boy fell asleep too, on my head! At least, he didn't fuss, nor cry, nor cling to mummy. He played with the magic cup till he fell asleep all on his own.
Hmmm.... I think I'll bring the cup to bed again soon.

The next night....

My Boy did his climbing stunt again after a feed. This time he went over to the shelf and took some books. I produced the magic cup but he wouldn't even glance at it. So I let him "read" his book in bed next to my head. After some time, he got up, walked over to his pillow and started to drag the pillow over to me. He looked very unhappy and I couldn't figure out what he was doing.

Then My Girl said "maybe he wants you to breastfeed." Haha. Now why didn't I think of that. She was right of course because the pillow she was dragging was the one I usually use to put him on for a feed. And it was confirmed as soon as I took the pillow from him and put it on my lap. His happy face and excited demeanour confirmed it. He must be thinking "Dungu mummy got it at last!"
And soon after that, he was sound asleep.

Cheap Thrill

Here's how some people found their way to me recently:

1. Someone...somewhere searched for "international kids song rhymes"
2. Someone...somewhere searched for "memories of mum"
3. Someone...somewhere searched for "taiwanese family hierachy" (Huh?)
4. Someone...somewhere searched for "breastfeeding wars" (Huh again?)
5. Someone...somewhere searched for "five languages of love articles"
6. Other searches that found its way to me include "I'm in shape round is a shape", "confinement lady in malaysia" (anyone interested in my confinement services. Its cheap! Haha.), "barney vcd", "mamak stall roti canai", "sahm housewife", "how to bring down a high fever", "if you" (huh?)

"Mumsgather" came out first place in the first 3 searches. Muahahahaha. (Cheap thrill)

My own quick search:

1. Yahoo Search for "mumsgather" resulted in 14000 mentions
2. Googled "mumsgather" and found 13800 results

Muahahahahaha. (Cheap thrill!) When I first started my website, a google search merely found 5 results. Now its 13800! Ok ok, its a small number compared to the big time bloggers but still a thrill nonetheless.

*Drumroll* Applause please! Thank you! Thank you! Ok. Thats my 5 minutes of fame. Now back to reality and back to work! See ya! (*Sighs* Blogging is so much fun. Hehehe.)

Just Another Day

Its Just Another Day
Of spit food and messy faces
I struggle with words to say
Till I get sweet smiles and big embraces

Its Just Another Day
Of big pools of pee on clean sheets
I no longer care my home's in disarray
But then innocent faces they look so sweet

Its Just Another Day
Of small tantrums and big tears
I look around in dismay
Then little voices bring me cheer

On my knees from morn to night
Picking toys, wiping butts and stopping fights
Always never far from sight
Its Just Another Day for this mom of might

Feeding, bathing, entertaining
My day is full from dawn to dusk
Chasing, scolding and then teaching
Its Just Another Day filled up with tasks

Dispelling fears and wiping tears
My day quickly passes from day to day
And soon I'll look back through the years
On this day when I'm old and gray


Help! I'm suffering from

Copyright: Mumsgather

(Copy this poem and you too shall suffer from endless mommy burnout whether you're a mommy or not, so there!)

There! I feel better now..... after letting out this cyber scream..... since I can't very well go to a mountain top to scream!

This poem was written yesterday and finished this morning inspired by my inability to provide Mr MG with a peaceful, happy, evening with the kids as I resolved to do since he is having a stressful time at work. Instead what he got was crying kids and a screaming wife and mum. So sad. I think I need a little time for myself again so that I can give the best of myself because I've run out of energy, batteries and patience from my exhaustion just being a mom!

Young Again

The wind blew our damp hair over our faces. We laughed and giggled as the car cruised down the road. We wore happy smiles and did not have a worry in the world.

The sun shone down on us. I could almost hear the sound of the waves lapping on the sandy beach. The radio was playing a fun, holiday type of music.

Our hair was drying up under the sun and the wind. It was a moment to remember.

"Mummy, the wind blew your hair over your face, so ugly." said My Girl and she giggled even harder as she struggled to keep the hair out of her own face. This made My Boy burst into joyous laughter. He was laughing simply because everyone else was.

We were merely taking the kids out for a drive in the car with the windows down to "ventilate" it after spraying insecticide to get rid of some insects we discovered to our horror in the car. (Crash! Back to reality. Enough daydreaming. Haha.) Seriously, apart from the coloured text, everything else was real, not imagined. Thats what having kids is all about. Even a drive in the hot afternoon sun with the windows down can be so much fun. I think as adults we would probably grumble about the heat instead of enjoying the moment as we did.

I've forgotten how it feels like to drive around without the aircond on. My Girl kept on asking "Whats that sound?" because with the windows down, you could clearly hear the sounds of the traffic which is often blocked out by the shut windows.

Truly, having kids does not make me feel older. It makes me feel young again, seeing the world through their eyes. Instead of feeling hot and bothered, I felt as if we were driving around a stretch of beach in a sportscar. Hehehe. (*Grins*)

Specialists. Hmmrmph!!

Warning! Ranting post ahead.

I hate going to Specialists, eye, ear, heart, whatever. Perhaps it usually means that something is wrong with you (accept if you're seeing a gynae during pregnancy). When I think of visiting a specialist my mind is filled with the image of packed waiting rooms, waiting for hours just to see someone for a few minutes. And more often than not that someone would give curt replies to our questions and usually we have many questions to ask during the visit. Its almost as if the specialist is saying "C'mon. Out with it and out with you. Next!" Its even worse when you have to drag two young kids along with you to the visits. Geez!

Anyway, I'm ranting because I had an ear infection that wouldn't go away. No choice but to visit the ENT. No packed waiting rooms as I envisaged but he wanted to make me come back for repeat visits (I think). After two visits and a whopping RM450 gone, my ear problems have not gone away. I decided to discontinue the visit and went to the pharmacy to buy more of the eardrops I was prescribed. It cost me only RM4!!!! Hmmmm..... Ear infection was cured when I finished that bottle of eardrops but its back now. (*Grumble grumble grumble*). Thats probably why I'm ranting. No offence if you're a specialist reading this blog.

Funny things children say

My Girl continues to amuse and thrill me with her words.

My Girl: "Mummy, what is that?" (points to my eye)

MG: "What?"

My Girl: "Its me!" (she exclaimed with excitement.) "Like mirror like that." (as she points to the pupils of my eye and saw her own reflection.)

MG: "Hahaha. Ya, thats mummy's reflection. Look! Mummy is in there too." (Points to her eyes.)

New Game devised by My Girl.

My Girl: "I want this one." (points to me.)

MG: "Whats this?" (Puzzled)

My Girl: "Mummy!" (Beaming. Then comes and hugs me and we would both break into laughter at this funny game she devised.)

Too Tired

The day before yesterday My Boy did not have a good afternoon nap. Later in the evening around 9pm....

Baby was all ready for bed and Mr MG had gone into the room for a rest so I told him to watch baby while I got My Girl ready for bed.. ie brush teeth, wash face etc.

When I was changing My Girl into her pyjamas I could hear baby crying on and off and Mr MG singing very loudly in the bedroom. After changing My Girl, we went into the room and there was baby sound asleep on daddy's chest. Hahaha. Baby must have been very tired to fall asleep with his daddy singing so very loudly.

Daddy didn't want to move for a while savouring the moment so we let him sleep that way for a while.

According to Mr MG, baby was tired and fretful so he sang very loudly to provide him with some distraction to fall asleep and it worked! Hahaha. Thats the loudest lullaby I ever heard and it wasn't even a lullaby song. It was just Mr MG's signature tune/bedtime song for the kids. My Man can't sing! He certainly won't sing for me but for the kids.... anytime... but I don't mind.

Of waving bye bye and flying kisses

Just wanted to record here an update of My Boy's development. My Boy has many skills now. My Boy Can:

• Clap Hands (One of the first skills he learned. Wonder why its that way with most babies. Hehe. I think its becos they have just discovered their hands and are delighted they can make sounds with them.)
• Point Here and There ("I wanna go/see here/there/this/that")
• Wave Bye Bye
• Blow A Kiss
• Pull my hand to guide me to do something for him (eg. take a toy back from his sister, read a book etc)
• Dance (ppl call him a disco kaki in the making wor)
• "Read" a book (Or when I read to him, he would smile from ear to ear when I open a page to reveal a favourite nursery rhyme or story)
• Do some of the actions in an action song or rhyme when being read or sang to. For eg stamping feet (If You're Happy And You Know It song) or tipping himself over the side (I'm A Little Teapot Song) as is required by the song.
• Give a wet kiss. Hehe. Meaning a kiss full of drool for mummy only!
• Climb down the bed by himself in the morning (the bed is almost as tall as him but he would go to the edge, turn himself around, then come down, legs first. hehe. smart boy.)
• Play with toys in the correct manner instead of merely flinging them around. haha. He likes to take his sister's masak masak toys, pretend to "cook" then "feed" us with the toy spoon
• His molars are out! Ok. That was not a skill but just wanted to record this development somewhere.

On Sunday night we were playing with some blocks when we stuck some blocks together and pretended that it was a phone. Putting the 'phone' next to our ear, we said "Hello" and he did the exact same thing and said "Hello" too. (Though it sounded more like "Ewa". He repeated it a few more times. Hubby and I wants to wait for more confirmation before we declare "Hello" as his first word. Hehe.

On Monday night, we were reading bedtime stories and we pointed to the clock and I think he said "Clock" after us. Tried it again last night with the real clock and again he said "Clock". So maybe thats the second word. Must hear him repeat it a few more times before can confirm.

My Girl's first words were:

1. "Daddy" (not even dada or papa but "daddy" - is it any wonder that she is daddy's girl?)
2. "Car" (maybe she likes to go out in a car ride)
3. "Lights" (becos everytime I put her down to change, I point to the lights and say "lights" so that she would be distracted and not turn over. Me things My Boy will say "Lights" too pretty soon becos I'm using the same old trick. ) and
4. "Chair" (not sure why)

Blog Birthday Present

Anyone noticed the brand new animation I've got on my sidebar? Its lovely isn't it? Its supposed to be me trying to do some work with My Girl and My Boy "helping" out. Hehehe.

Many, many thanks to the talented blogger Maria for this wonderful blog birthday present. Jeles or not y'all? Wanna have one? Go be nice to her. Hahaha. Just kidding.

P.S. Maria, you did it on white background so I made it transparent to blend with my sidebar colors using this tool from GIFWorks.com. Maybe you can find the site useful for some of your works. Thanks again!

Once upon a moonlit night....

Attended a mooncake festival gathering on Saturday. Hmm.. I thought I was a bad case with my lost culture but it would seem like the next generation is going to be worse off. Why?

• the gathering was merely an excuse to get-together so that the kids could play with lanterns and candles. Don't think anyone quite fully understands the significance of the celebrations.
• the mooncake didn't taste like mooncake
• some of the lanterns didn't look like lanterns, they resembled normal battery operated toys
• the kids (ranging from toddlers to teens) played with the lanterns for a very short while only after which everyone ran into the house to enjoy the cool aircond comfort, play the piano, guitar and organ and computer games.

Haiyh! Oh where oh where is our culture gone?

Tags, tags and more tags....

I owe twinsmom a shoe tag from looooonnnnng ago. Don't have many shoes, so going to give that a miss. Sorry Maria.

I pretended not to see Egghead's tag on 7 things you plan to do to do or something like that. You see, first I've got to go and do the 7 things on my priority which I've been procrastinating on. Sorry Egghead.

Then I chanced upon the life history tag from Atiza. Oops! I almost missed that. Sorry Atiza. That sounds like a fun tag but I'm not doing it becos James has spoilt it for everyone (*pouts*) since he did such a good post on that. Just looking for an excuse or someone to blame for not doing it. Haha. Sorry James.

I still remember the first time, I got tagged.... by Papi. I was a real dungu and didn't know what a meme was then and so I replied his tag... in his comments page! Sorry Papi. Then I got wiser and one day I tagged him back... but he didn't reply so he got his own back. Hehehe.

Solbi also owes me some tag on some subject matter which I can't quite remember now. Don't be sorry Solbi.

Mama22beas also tagged me before, but I've forgotten.... on what and whether I replied. Sorry Mama22beas.

Did I forget to mention anyone? I can be rather forgetful as you can see.

These tags/memes can be fun and often allows one to know a blogger better and its a good way to know more bloggers if you are linked and you link others back but sometimes, just sometimes it feels like an empty 'filler' post, or sometimes its just plain boorrring depending on my mood. Sometimes it feels just slightly better than an email chain letter which I will delete without reading. At least I read tags, occassionally. Jason calls it spam.

If you ever get tagged by me and don't feel like replying, well, just ignore it then.
If you ever tag me and I don't reply, or don't even realise it, then don't feel offended ok?
If you read a nice tag and feel like doing it even though nobody tagged you, then just go right ahead and write a post on it.

Well, that just about sums out how I feel about tags and memes.

Whats your feeling about tags or memes?

"We Don't Hold Grudges, Mummy."

Its funny but I think very young kids don't know how to hold grudges the way we adults or older kids do.

The reason I say this is when I'm scolding my kids, aged 1 1/2 and 3 1/2 years old, instead of getting angry at me (if they're not crying that is), My Boy will smile at me and My Girl will try to hug me. Its very disconcerting. Hmmm... I think its their secret little trick. I must learn that trick too and apply it to My Man. Khihkhihkhih....

A Blog Is Born

A Blog was born on 17 September 2004. It was called Mumsgather. How time flies. Its been a year!

I first started to try blogging in September 2004 but then I stopped after just two posts! Haha. Now, if it wasn't for 5xMom and twinsmom who infected me with the true blogging virus in November 2004, I wouldn't still be here, a year later. (Thanks ladies! *Muaks*)

I wanted to "celebrate" my blog birthday in November instead since thats when I really started blogging but since I had the first two posts in September I shall use this date as the anniversary date instead. (Hehe. Just like how couples not sure which date to celebrate anniversary ie the ceremony date or registration date if they fall on different dates.)

Since I don't blog on Saturdays, I'm posting this today.

Happy Birthday to Me
Happy Birthday to Me
Happy Birthday to Mumsgather
Happy Birthday to Me

Note: Singing to myself. Hehe. I'm only thick skinned on my blog.

Do you shout at your spouse in front of your kids?

When you're a couple, sometimes its inevitable that you should fight. I blogged sometime ago that happy couples fight and there are many stuff to fight about. If you don't, there's probably something wrong with you or the relationship. (Thats just my 2 cents). Its just not possible for two very different individuals living under the same roof, not to fight.

And so.... we fight and sometimes in front of the kids. Yeah! I know, I know. All the gurus and relationship books say "Don't fight in front of the kids." but how? Unless you have impeccable self control....... it happens.

One day in the midst of a shouting match, I could hear My Girl in the background, walking around mumbling to herself "Why is everybody talking like this?" Sometimes, during a fight, she would come to me and say "Why are you so upset? Its ok. Its ok."

OMG! OMG! I'm a bad mommy! I must really learn to tame that fiery temper of mine. Anyway, when we fight, no matter how angry we are with each other, our voices will soften with the kids or so we try lah! (I must admit that Mr MG is very much better than me at this becos his self control is better than mine).

Rainforest in a Shopping Complex

Took the kids to feed the koi fishes at the "Rainforest" in 1 Utama recently.

Baby/My Boy was so enthusiastic, had to keep on pulling him back by the collar to prevent him from falling into the pond. He kept on reaching out to try to touch the fishes. Hehe. Luckily none of them decided to try out the fish feed for themselves.

Before I forget, I also need to record my amazing "feat". Yes! Recently, we dragged two kiddoes out of bed at 6.30am, was out of the house by 7am (I even had time to put on some war paint to take photo for MyKad but had to wake up at 6.00am to do that :P), went to two govt departments (ie to do MyKad and to EPF for something else) and a customer service centre (to get update some documentation) and was back in the house by 12.00pm with breakfast and lunch all on the go. And we SURVIVED! Woohoo!

We were called to the counter at the same time when doing the MyKad and by that time baby was extremely fretful (What to do. Babies hate waiting around with nothing to do, much more than us adults hate it.) So we each took a kid with us. Yeeeee.... I dare not look at the MyKad photo when its ready. I'm sure I must look very hassled. Mr MG had to take his photo with toddler in tow. Luckily by the time it was my turn to take the photo, he could take a wiggly baby away from me, but I didn't have time to comb my hair....... or look in the mirror..... or put on fresh lipstick.......and I was sweating..... Yeeeeee!

The Lost Shoe

MG: "Oh No! Where's baby's shoes? Got one side only."

Mr MG: "Aiyah! I told you to check every once in a while to make sure they don't get lost."

MG: "I just checked a moment ago" :(

Mr MG: "Lets trace back our steps and see if we can find it."

This is very common occurence for us. We've lost one side of baby's shoes time and again. Dunno how many of the brand new kiddoes shoes we've lost this way during an outing.

I wonder why
Little shoes cost so much
I wonder why
Little shoes get lost so often

I'm amazed how
Little feet outgrow little shoes
I'm amazed how
Little people bring so much love

First Set of Wheels

I had some Jusco points to redeem before the year end and since we couldn't find anything we needed in the catalogue we finally decided on a tricycle for our little girl, her very first. Too bad, the tricycle was out of stock so we had to wait a couple of weeks for it.

My girl was really excited about it. We spoke about it everynight. We informed her that the girl in the department store said there was "No stock" so we had to wait till "the girl called us" before we went to "collect" the tricycle.

Everytime she was being naughty we reminded her that she was a big girl now and we had "ordered" her tricycle. Hahaha. (Bad parents). I also took this as an opportunity to take her off her diapers during naptime.

Finally "the girl called" and we went to "collect" the tricycle. My Girl waited patiently as we shopped around and went to the bookstore etc before we went to collect her new tricycle.

On Sunday we took her to the park and thats where she had her first fall! Ouch! Sakit Hatinya! We had just arrived there, put her on the bike and turned around for just a moment to look at baby and the next thing we knew, she was on the grass crying with the bike on top of her. Ouch! Ouch! Luckily that did not deter her from trying out her bike and she really enjoyed herself. Yeah!

Photo sourced from www.jusco.com.my

Are Women More Affectionate than Men?

I wonder whether women are more affectionate than Men? I, for one, love being affectionate. I love to hold hands, hug, cuddle and be close to my beloved. Perhaps thats because my primary love language is physical touch. Now, for those of you with one tracked minds, you'd have to read this to know what I mean when I say my love language is physical touch.

Previously Mr MG was not as affectionate as I would have liked him to be (he was quite stingy with his hugs/it was difficult to wrangle a hug out of him) but he is well trained now. Once he asked me "Huh? Go up the stairs (at home) also must hold hands ah?" Hehe. Another time I had to tell him (Hey! If I don't tell how would he know right?) that when we go shopping etc, I'd like it very much if he remembered to be affectionate..... this was told after the babies came along. Its hard to hold hands or put arms around each other when you have to carry baby or hold little hands but we manage.

Now, happily, Mr MG is very affectionate (maybe more than me even) and I'm loving it. I love when he strokes or brushes my hair/face or when he playfully hits my bottom when he passes by, things like that. I wonder if the men like to be affectionate like that or is it a woman thing, like the way we love to hear the words "I Love You" uttered. Do men like to be affectionate or do they say "C'mon. Stop fussing over me."

My First Goodnight Kiss

Last night, after our chit chat, my girl reached over and gave me several goodnight kisses. She is a very affectionate little girl, just like her mummy! Hehehe. Which brings me to my next post... "Are women more affectionate than men?"

Ok. Sorry, I got sidetracked. Anyway, suddenly baby stood up from his side of the bed and walked towards me. I was wondering what was happening when I saw his little face lunge towards me with mouth open and then I realised it. He was imitating his sister and giving me a goodnight kiss. (Only it felt like he was trying to eat my face. Haha.) He then tried again several times. *Muaks! Muaks! Muaks!* He looked very pleased with his new found skill afterwards.

Yes baby! Mummy loves you too! What a moment! I love it! I love the moment and shall include it among the snapshots in my mind.

Its so Easy..... (Reflections of a SAHM - Part 4)

Its so easy.....

1. to shake/throw a crying baby who won't stop crying
2. to leave a baby sitting in his poo/pee when you've changed one diaper too many
3. to slap a toddler who won't eat food you've so painfully prepared
4. to hit a noisy child who won't stop whining (its ok to hit to discipline but I'm talking about hitting very hard.. much more than is justified)
5. to beat up a kid who messes up after everything you've just cleaned/picked up
6. to starve a helpless baby who refuses to drink up his/her milk
7. to lock up a kid unattended in a room so that you'd have some private time/they'd quit following you around when you're too busy
8. to forget simple child safety measures when you are too distracted (eg. letting a child get too near the fire, playing with telephone or other cords, not being nearby to monitor when a child is climbing all over unsafe furniture, allowing a child to eat foods that could be choking hazards unsupervised etc.. its a long, looo...nng list)
9. to let a naughty kid have his/her way (ie to give in to unreasonable demands) so that you could get on with whatever it is you need to do (the opposite of hitting too hard)
10. to ignore/neglect a baby who needs attention when you're preoccupied

Its just too easy to abuse/neglect a helpless baby/child especially a child who is not old enough to tell. And it becomes easier and easier the more and more hours you have to deal with the baby/child. I know. Cos' I have to deal with 2 under 4 years of age 24/7 and I have to constantly remind myself not to do any of those things above. And I'm the mother! What more a maid/sitter who is unrelated to the child. Especially if its a young maid from a foreign country struggling to make a living away from her own family and friends in an unfamiliar place. Gosh. Scary!

Why I'm a SAHM.....

I don't have any mum or mum-in-law who could help out (Even if I had I would not ask them to help out. Looking after young kids is very hard work and I think its unfair to ask our elderly parents to help us out when they should be enjoying their golden years. Hey! They've already gone through the tough part with us! Let them enjoy a little bit now.)

I could never leave my child alone with a maid at home and I have no one to act as a watchful eye (Its important to have another adult around to spy monitor the situation at home) so that too is out of the question.

I hate the idea of leaving my little ones at a sitter when they are so young (I'd like them to be in the comfort of their own home, not needing to be woken up very early and rushed from place to place. Life is a rush, so why start rushing them so young) so thats out too. My kids wake up when they've had enough rest. And they wake up to a relaxed mummy who's there to play with them a little before breakfast. I don't have to wake them up from their sleep, then change a sleepy baby and rush them out of the house. I just hate the thought of having to do that.)

Being of such untrusting nature. Hehe. (Especially when it comes to my kids), thats why I'm a SAHM. In my 10 points above, I was merely talking about the basic act of childcare ie feeding and cleaning but theres so much more to it. Theres the act of nurturing, disciplining, teaching, guiding, giving love and attention to build security and so much more. How could I possibly leave all that to another person to handle for hours on end? So thats why I'm a SAHM and loving it!

Disclaimer: These are my personal opinions. Please understand that I'm not saying theres anything wrong with mums who do not care for their children themselves full time. So don't flame me. :)

Relections of a SAHM - Part 3

I feel very fortunate indeed everynight when I take the kids to bed. I feel fortunate that I do not have any work stress to take my focus off my kids. No morning meetings to worry about, no important deadlines, business trips, etc etc to think about. My full focus and attention is on and for them.

Singing, reading and chatting with the kids is much more fun than if my mind was cluttered with other stuff ie. wondering elsewhere or is full of worry about the next day. Of course one could say that you should separate work from home by worrying about work only at work but its easier said than done of course.

Balancing work with family becomes very important after the kids come along. I'm sure even the men struggle with this. I personally feel that if anyone would rather spend more time working than with the family (taking money out of the equation) than something must be quite wrong.

Its really not easy to balance work with family. I'm glad I don't have to do it!

Reflections of a SAHM - Part 2

"I'm just a housewife." she said softly almost apologetically, her head slightly downcast.

Hehehe. Thats certainly not going to be the response you get from me if you meet up with me. Back when I was working, I remember when I met up with old classmates some of which have become very successful at work, some of which have become housewives and while the corporates were passing their business cards around, the housewives answer was as above. Ok! Ok! I exagerated but the gist is that they were not proud of the fact that they were housewives. Why ever not?! I can't understand that.

I'm certainly not ashamed or embarassed of the fact that I'm a housewife, staying home to look after my kids and my home. The response I often get when I tell ppl that I'm a housewife is:

• "Wah. You have the good life." or "Enjoy life lah you."
• "Wah! You goyang kaki lah. So good"
• "You can tahan ah? Stay at home all day? The kids don't drive you up the wall?"
• "Don't you feel bored?"
• "Good lah you. Made such a sacrifice."
• "Don't you feel that your skills are wasted staying at home?"

Well, they're all wrong. Its not a big, great sacrifice. Why should it be? I love to look after my kids myself. I'd like to be there for them, now when they are young and need a lot of care and attention and later on I'd like to be there for them when they get home from school with a hot lunch waiting and someone to chat with. I enjoy being with them. How can anyone call it a sacrifice?

Its not "the good life". Being a full time housewife is no easy job but of course I enjoy life. Life is short. I would try to enjoy life anyway, whether I'm working or otherwise.

Goyang kaki? More time? Hahaha. I had lots lots more time when I was working. Why! I had one full hour for lunch! One of my jobs was not deskbound so I felt I had even more time. (Sometimes I had to be at several places at the same time but thats ok because in between appointments can steal some time. Heh heh!) Now, I still have to be at several places at the same time, only... I can't steal some time with these bosses. In fact, I'll be happy if I had some time to have a long bath and an uninterupted meal and theres never any time to read the papers.

Skills wasted? I have many skills, yes (Hehe. Blowing own trumpet. All of us have our skills yes or not?) Do I fear that they are "wasted". Not at all. My skills are being put to the best use of all. For people that matter to me most. They're being used to teach, nurture and guide my children. Of course they're not being paid for financially but not everything is about money. And I'm never afraid that I can put my skills to work again should the situation arise or call for it. Once you have a skill, its always there. I have a good work attitude and I'm always eager to learn new things so I shall always be employable should I choose to be. (This is for mums who want to stay at home but feel afraid to take the step.)

Bored? Hahaha. Hardly! I don't have time to be bored. So next time, anyone tells you they are a housewife, please, puh...leaze don't give them any of the above responses. Now, I'm BORED with those responses because they're so cliche, unoriginal and inaccurate, YOU HEAR ME??!!

The Funny things she says

In the Living Room

"Mummy, look got Bob The Builder there!" points excitedly to a construction site.

In the Kitchen

MG: "Baby! You are not supposed to be in the kitchen. C'mon! Stop pulling at my leg. Don't be naughty. Mummy is busy. Aiyoh! Why are you following me everywhere!"

My Girl: "Daddy, daddy! Faster! Faster come and take baby. Baby has turned into a monster in the kitchen."

MG: Hahahaha. (MG sometimes calls out to Mr MG to take baby away when working in the kitchen and we sometimes refer to them as monsters when they are being naughty.. hence the funny response.)

In the Bedroom

MG reading: "Eyes for peeking. Ears for hearing. Mouth for laughing. Head for thinking."

MG explains: "Do you know that we use our heads for thinking? We think about what to eat, what to wear, how to solve the jigsaw puzzle, where to go... "

MG asks: "Can you tell mummy what you are thinking about right now?"

My girl: "I'm thinking..... about mummy!" (said with a big, happy smile)

My girl sure knows how to bodek mummy. I think she was a little bit embarassed by my obvious delight with her response afterwards. Haha.

Who Links To You?

When I first started blogging, the kind Narrowband told me that I could check who linked to me by typing my url on the search box in Technorati. I had a thrill trying it out. Haha! Cheap thrill I know. Thats part of the fun I have in blogging ie trying out the various blogging tools available on the web.

I was going to blog about this awhile ago when I discovered PubSub but then I saved it as draft and forgot all about it until I came across this article: "Blog Link Tracking Reviewed" in The Blog Herald. Its an excellent review and I had fun checking who linked to me as well as trying out some of the other tools available on Blogpulse.

Why not try it out too? As a blogger, you'll enjoy it I'm sure!

Reflections of a SAHM - Part 1

"He's afraid. He's resentful, frustrated and depressed. He feels trapped by his responsibility to provide for his family. He's locked into a job or career that he no longer enjoys because he must keep the kids in college and make payments on the house and car.If he's like most men, he may be in responsibility overload and desperately in need of a break from financial responsibilities and the daily demands of work that he's probably had since he got out of school. He may resent the fact he cannot make the choices that so many women can as far as choosing whether or not they want to work and at what. He needs a long break from responsibility but he knows that is an impossibility. If he stops, he loses everything he has worked so hard for, but, if he doesn't stop, there is a good chance he will lose it anyway. He's trapped."

excerpts from the article "HIS Midlife Crisis! Will Your Relationship Survive?" by Pat Gaudette, founder of The Midlife Club

My greatest regret about becoming a SAHM (housewife) is the pressure it puts on my man. Unlike women, most of the time, a man has no choice. He can't say "I want to quit to look after the kids." Thats tough!

Its even harder for men whose wives do not work. Not happy with the job? Not happy with the boss? the company? the long hours? etc etc??? Just grin and bear it or change jobs but change is never easy especially if your whole household depends on your one single income. The pressure must be tremendous. Sigh.

Somedays, I feel like my man is out there fighting a fire breathing mythical creature while me and the kids are in our cave protected and safe. Perhaps its time for me to don an armour to fight the creature alongside my man.

Easy Screen Capture

I just discovered that you can do a simple screen capture without using any professional program. So I'm putting the steps here before I forget how to. Being very vain (hehe), I've done a screen capture/screenshot of my webpages just for the fun of it and put them in this post with links to my pages. I haven't yet learned how to put the links on to the pictures itself. ("Next time lah...") For now, here are the steps on how to to a simple screen capture using your clipboard:

Step 1 Press Ctrl, Alt, Print Scrn

Step 1 (Edited) Press Alt, Print Scrn to capture the Active Window
Step 2 Press Start, All Programs, Accessories, Paint
Step 3 Press Ctrl V
Step 4 Press File, Save As, (Choose JPEG format), Filename. The File will be saved as a Pic file which can be called up to paste in any document you so desire. (I'm a copy and paste expert after all!)

Examples:

I'll Always Be Here

Mummy Play With Me

My Breastfeeding Story

My Kitchen

Step 1 has been edited, thanks to Tien Soon and Egghead.

Malaysians in a Queue

During the August 31st public holiday, as on any public holiday, it was packed at the malls.

While queueing up behind a man at a fastfood joint, I was not very surprised when his wife suddenly dashed from another queue to join him when it was his turn to order. As if that was not bad enough, they then called their 3 kids over and took about 20 minutes deciding what to order. Hrrrmmph...kiasu M'sians.

While queueing up to pay my car park ticket, I was behind a little girl of about 4. Her mum was standing in the next booth which looked like it was about to be opened, and when it did, she pulled her little girl almost roughly to her side leaving the little girl confused "Why mummy?" I didn't hear her reply but her expression for her little girl wasn't very nice. Hrrrmmmppph.... another kiasu M'sian.

Unrelated to queueing incident but while we're being "8 lady"/"patt poh"(busybody).... might as well continue....

At the park, a mum was forcing her little girl to walk up and down the see saw when it was quite obvious that the little girl was reluctant to do so. She was crying "I'm scared." Her mum ignored her cries and proceeded to make her pose for several photos with her elder sister even though she looked rather unhappy and uncomfortable. When their dad turned up, mum proudly proclaimed "I'm teaching her balancing skills." Hrrrmmmpphh.... Dunno what to say to that. "Balancing skills oso must teach one meh?" Another lesson here? Don't make kids pose for photos. Spontaneous, candid snapshots are much better.

Another lady came to the park with husband, two kids, a maid and an elderly lady. It was a Sunday morning and she was dressed up to the nines with heavy make-up and refused to sit down anywhere on the park chairs complaining all the while. Hmm... why even bother coming to the park in the first place?

MG is kaypoh today but these scenes reminds me to be extra careful about my own behaviour because as a parent we are teaching our kids by example all the time. Sometimes when we're tired or rushed, we forget. Psssttt.. I must look very much like the kiasu M'sian too when asking a very reluctant hubby to queue at another line at the supermarket so that we would be faster as it was late and the kids were fretty. (*Hangs head in shame*) So..... think twice before you throw your tissue out your moving car or in the drain. Your kids are watching you all the time. (And so are other busybody bloggers. Hehehe.)

What Merdeka Means to the little ones

What Merdeka means to a three year old

"Mummy, look got Merdeka car!" (points to a passing car with a flag) - Excited

"How come that building is full of flags?" - Puzzled

"Merdeka! Merdeka! Merdeka! (prancing around the house waving hand held flag and singing just like on TV) - Happy

What Merdeka means to a one year old

Knocks mummy's head repeatedly with the hand held flag. ("Ahh... another device to knock Mummy's head with, just like a drumstick.") - Excited

Toddles around the house waving hand held flag, just like his sister. - Happy

"Waaaahhhhhhh!" (Sister tries to snatch hand held flag from him) - Not so Happy.

MG Notes: Looks like the Kibarkan Jalur Gemilang (Fly the Malaysian Flag) campaign is a success..... at least with my kids. It adds a feeling of festivity in the air for the little ones even though they're too young to understand what Merdeka means for now.

Mama's Vs Papa's

I'm back from my blog break. I thought I might have some time to read blogs even when I was not blogging but in the end, I didn't have the time. So, after two weeks, this is what I got on my feed reader.

Looks like the Mama's have more to say than the Papa's with a total of 151 posts vs 61 posts. (So what else is new?) But the statistics not accurate lah... I've got more Mama's on my feedreader.

Wah! So many posts to read. 151 + 61 + 157 makes 369. Think I'll have to mark them all as read. Can't possibly catch up with all. Sob. Sob.


Mama's on the blog (151)
5xmom (31)
Along's Blog (1)
annieblog (5)
Apa-apa je
Bkworm (2)
Chrissy's blog
The Curious Incident (27)
Double Happiness 双喜临门 (15)
Faythe's Baby Blog (4)
Happy Family (1)
I Am A Domestic Goddess (4)
In Search of Oneself (5)
Inspirations
Lollies's Modblog (8)
Mama22beas (5)
Msau & SQ Playground (2)
Musings By the Amused (7)
My Little Sunshine (3)
myBabyBay.com Blog (7)
Shamira's Little World (4)
Shopping Mum (7)
The Suzette (7)
生活点滴 (6)

Papa's on the Blog (61)
Belacan Times (7)
Breakthroughs (4)
Dude of my Kingdom (2)
Little Luke "Skywalker" (9)
Loopy Meals (12)
My Life (14)
PapiMami (9)
Through My Eyes (4)

Others on the blog (157)
AlwaysWoW! (7)
Anan's Journal
The Angelic Grace
Autumn Music (1)
Buangmasa
CrazyGrr's NoNSenSe (6)
Doc's blog (18)
Evening Primrose Oil
Fishtail (3)
Fret-Work
Frozenlily - MunKit Online
Heavenly's blog (8)
I think....therefore I am
It's all about me, myself & I (22)
Jason Mumbles (10)
JustNice (3)
Kiasi aka Kiasi-ism (9)
Living Gem (3)
Malaysia Best (13)
Matakecil
Mei's TheScarfer (6)
Mr Kiasu
Mystiqangel (9)
Oliviasy's (5)
Rojaks Daily (6)
simontalks.com (13)
The Solbourne Identity (10)
Sweetness Of the Mango
Treasurable Memories (5)
Twins Comic